As I sit here crying still.... I can't believe it.
The ring that Brian totally surprised me with, changed my life, kept me in this god forsaken state 8 years ago.... is probably in the hands of someone else, or already pawned for the gold. I can't stop crying.
It all started when on Monday my sister in law called me to go and pick up her family pictures for her. I said fine. I'll run up and get them and meet her at my mother in law's house.
So yesterday, I fed Kellyn, and left for the mall around 2pm. As I pulled in the parking lot, I decided to go to Macy's to get some yogurt, then walked across the hall to New York and Co. to see if I could find some clothes that actually fit my butt these days. I walked around there shopping for a while, found some stuff (didn't try it on, I always do that at home, and then return whatever doesn't work) waited in line, and paid for it. Then I made my way across the mall to Sears to grab the pictures before leaving. I go up, chat with Jen B. for a little while, and then leave.
I get out to the car, and leave the lot. I get as far as Central City and Wayne's turn lane and realize that something feels different. Shit...... Where's my ring??
Right away, I start to freak out inside. So I make the left turn, pull into Best Buy, and start tearing my car apart. I look through the bags, shake out all the clothes, get out, look behind/under my seat.
Nothing. Great, I have no cell and have to head back to the mall to search.
I did all the backtracking I could. I walked the same routes I walked, went up stairs and called my mother in law just to *hope* that for some odd reason, I took it off, and it was there. No such luck. Then I lost it. Tears were flowing, she was on the other end of the line just hurt for me. I left the studio and made it into the mall. The whole time, crying. I know I looked like a lunatic in my yoga pants and brians too big redwings t-shirt. But I didn't care about that. I just wanted to see it laying on the ground in front of me, and be able to breathe a sigh of relief.
It didn't happen.
The people at New York & Co. were so great, but I knew, if it hit the floor....I had like a 2% chance of some honest person going, "hey I just found this on the floor." to one of their associates. And a 98% chance of them going, sweeeeeeeeet and pocketing it with no second thought that there was someone DEVASTATED at its loss.
I walked through Macy's on the route that I took to get yogurt, went to customer service.... nothing. Went back to NY&C, and cried a little more. I didn't want to leave the mall with out it, but at that point I was sure Kellyn was freaking out at Brian's moms, and I didn't want her to suffer. If she'd only take a bottle these days, I coulda looked more.
I saw Mall security out there on my way back, talked to them...... nothing.
So I drove home. Tears streaming down my face the whole way. Why didn't I just go and get the pictures and go back? Hindsight is 20/20. I was free for just a few minutes, I took advantage of no kids. And this is how I pay. With a broken heart.
So Brian called his moms when I got back, and he knew something was wrong, and wouldn't let me just not say. He asked if I got in an accident, my reply was..."i wish." At least I could pay the deductible, and get it fixed. The only fix for this is some honest person to turn it in.
He tried to console me that night by saying, "some people get new wedding rings all the time." True. But it was so special to me. He took it upon himself to surprise me with it so long ago. All the kids have had their tiny hands and feet photographed with it along with his....
And I know its not the ring that defines our love and commitment to each other, but it did have huge special meaning to me. And right now, I can't bear to think that its gone. Braden keeps handing me tissues and saying, "don't cry." But I can't help it. There could be some tear stained shirts for a few days. Pray for its safe return. But I'm not counting on it.
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